Growing up my mother always told me "we define our own happiness." Every individual experiences various events in their lives, which molds them into a certain being. From those experiences, we begin to form a concept of what happiness means to us individually. We tend to do so through creating several relationships as we grow up. These relationships may be friendships, romantic relationships, or parent-child relationships.
In order to create happiness in a romantic relationship, you must first have an understanding of yourself. You need to know who you are as an individual, your likes as well as dislikes, as well as your flaws and how they can make it difficult to become closer to another individual. This is never easy and generally doesn't occur over night. However once we understand ourselves, we're able to connect on a deeper level with others. The key to a good “relationship” is a good foundation. If you know who you are, and your partner understands their needs and wants, then it is easy to determine whether or not the relationship shall work out. If you're able to be yourself with your partner then there is nothing better then that, to be with someone who accepts you for who you are. Every relationship will come with bumpy roads and disagreements. You simply must pick and choose your battles, and work things out. Compromises and negotiations occur, how ever if you can never see eye to eye, you're better off separated, where you both can be happy. Knowing your core-self is very important in a romantic relationship. Knowing who you are and your internal characteristics. Having a clear idea of how patient or how frustrated you can be may avoid any conflict in a relationship. In the book of Happier, Lord Byron mentioned, “The core self comprises our deepest and most stable characteristic - our character. If you in love with someone you would like that person to know who you really are from the inside but first you need to know who you are.”
Some people think that a good relationship is when they find the right person, but it really all depends on how you cultivate and know your partner. It is important to maintain a good relationship participated in activities that are significant or enjoyable to us as well as to our partner. Spending time together, building a strong communication base is an important factor to cultivate happier relationships. Cultivating a happier romantic relationship almost guarantee longer and healthier relationship. The problem in finding a relationship is that there's no such thing as the perfect one.
Elizabeth Barrett Browning says “I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself but also for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out.”
Knowing and accepting your romantic partner is something that I suggest any one who looking for a long term relationship and healthy relationship to practice. Accepting your mate’s bad habits and the good is something you have to experience. If you cannot accept the person for who they are or the actions they choose to do then there will be negative feeling floating around. Knowing your partner is also an important factor to a healthy relationship. Love cannot last without a rational foundation. In the book of Happier, Lord Byron stated, “To be loved for our wealth, power, or fame is to be loved conditionally; to be loved for our steadfastness intensity, or warmth is be loved unconditionally.”
Unconditional love is so different from the kind of love most of us have known all our lives that it deserves both a name “Real Love” and definition of its own. Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves. It’s also Real Love when other people care about our happiness unconditionally. It is not Real Love when other people like us for doing what they want. Under those conditions we’re just paying for love again. We can be certain that we’re receiving Real Love only when we make foolish mistakes, when we fail to do what other people want, and even when we get in their way, but they don’t feel disappointed or irritated at us. Love alone has the power to heal all wounds, bind people together, and create relationships quite beyond our present capacity to imagine. There’s only one kind of love that can fill us up, make us whole, and give us the happiness we all want: unconditional love or true love. It is unconditional love that we all seek, and somehow we intuitively realize that anything other than that kind of love isn’t really love at all—it’s an imitation of the real thing, like conditional love. We mostly see it everywhere. What could be wrong with it? Imagine that every time I do you a favor you tell me I love you. We could do that all day, but at the end of the day would you feel loved? No, because I’d know that you “loved” me only because I did you a favor. We simply can’t feel fulfilled by love we pay for. We can feel loved only when it is freely, unconditionally given to us.
True happiness in a romantic relationship is loving and accepting your partner’s bad habits and actions. Which can build a strong chemistry between the two. The “right person” that can make the relationship grow to unconditional love is the one who excepts you core-self and understands who you are. The key to true happiness is not so easy, people just have to be willing to take the risk and open up their heart because relationships are based on love, trust, and honor.
